Quite early in life when my family saw hardships in certain aspects of being, we all reacted in different ways that shaped us to the people we have become today, long after the hardships are over.
While I never was an active part of the hardship, being a passive player molded some of my core values; I became extra cautious about everything.
Along the journey to where I stand today, I met some fabulous people. Some of them continue to be lifelines and pillars, and without them my life would not hold much meaning.
My friend J, is one them.
Very different yet similar to me, she has an extra ordinary zest for life.
Why do I remember her today?
While I crunch and I save for a rainy day and cannot go and spend a fortune on something without contemplating for a few days, weighing the pros and con’s, my friend J is completely the opposite.
Always fun, spontaneous and the one to get the party started, she will go through tough times but always look at the fun part of it. Everything has a bright, funny side for her.
Many people don’t know that this feisty thing has a side to her that’s extremely caring, spiritual and meditative.
When I sat holding my head today because things were not going according to MY plan, I thought of my friend J.
How she would laugh at what happened, call me and joke about her having been a thief in a previous life to suffer such bad karma today.
I sit here thinking of her and wondering if keeping each step so carefully is the right thing.
Perhaps when we try and walk in a straight line we forget the beautiful twists and turns that go along with the line.
Perhaps it is Ok to worry a little about financials, a zero social life, a nonexistent romantic life, a horrible job, the lack of a million things etc, but never so much that you forget to enjoy the moment and the people you have to share even these sad times with.
Perhaps, J’s way is the better way. At least you smile through shit.
We are lucky to have friends passively molding us while we actively take charge of our life.
Friends who don’t need to say or do much to be listened to.
While everything else depletes, the vastness of friendship increases.
And teaches us, like J has taught me ... that it is perfectly OK to sometimes look at yourself from a top angle and laugh your guts out at the crappy situation you are in.
Sometimes, that just helps.